Why Does a Narcissist Always Lurk Around You?

Have you ever felt like a narcissist is always lurking around you, watching your every move? It's not just a one-time thing; it's the nature of how a narcissist operates. They are not interested in your well-being or your happiness; their actions and intentions are rooted in self-interest and manipulation.

No Love, Just Hoovering

The term "hoovering" is a term used by some to describe the behavior of a narcissist. When they say, "Why is a narcissist always lurking around you?" they are referring to their attempt to 'vacuum up' people or situations for their own benefit. It is not about love or genuine concern; it is about their need for Narcissistic Supply. Narcissists often return to people they have hurt or abandoned to gauge if they still matter, to see if they can still be of use to the narcissist's agenda.

Convenience and Control

Narcissists feel entitled to get what they want, and they think of others as mere 'supply'. A long-term supply is convenient for a narcissist because it can provide backup sex, financial support, housekeeping, and childcare. This setup allows the narcissist to exploit the supply without any real consequences and to continue their manipulative behavior.

Endure the Truth for Your Own Sake

When a narcissist is around, it is crucial to understand the reasons behind their behavior. They will keep you around to bounce back on you when they are bored with life. You might think this is a sign of love or affection, but it is merely their way to maintain control over you. They aim to use you when you are most vulnerable, taking advantage of your fragility and emotional distress.

They Want to See You Suffer

Narcissists return to you to see if you are still suffering or if you have managed to move on. It is not out of concern or care but because they get a rush from seeing you struggle. They thrive on the pain they cause, as it fulfills them and makes them feel better about themselves. If you have managed to overcome their toxic behavior, it will upset them, as it breaks their pattern of control.

Sabotage and Hoovering

In addition to hoovering, a narcissist may sabotage your happiness as a form of manipulation. If you are starting to succeed or find joy, they will do everything in their power to bring you down, including turning people against you, harassing you, and stealing from you. Their goal is to hinder your progress and make you miserable, just as they feel. If you left them, they are only returning to punish you, further illustrating their destructive nature.

Stay Strong and Independent

To break free from the cycle of manipulation, it is crucial to stay strong and independent. Rebuild your life, your relationships, and your self-esteem. Do not give the narcissist the satisfaction of seeing you in a worse state. Show them that you have not been defeated and that you can still live the life you want to live. Remember, the narcissist only has their eyes on things they are envious of or things they want to take. They have nothing to offer you but abuse and manipulation. Stand strong and walk away from their toxic influence.