Why Some Parents Believe They Can Dominate Their Children

Parents exercise varying degrees of control over their children, stemming from a variety of reasons, including cultural, religious, and societal influences. In this article, we explore why some parents might think they have the right to dominate their children, particularly in the context of certain religious beliefs and cults. Understanding these factors can provide insight into why such beliefs exist and how they can be addressed.

Origins of Patriarchal Influence

One of the primary sources of this belief in parental dominance comes from patriarchal religious and cultural structures, where children are often seen as the property of their parents. In such contexts, the concept of children’s rights is either non-existent or severely limited. Several religious and cultic groups have historically reinforced these beliefs, including:

Mormon Culture: Ellis Snow, a well-known Mormon author, stresses the importance of parental authority in his publications. The culture teaches that children are a gift from God, and parents have significant responsibility and authority over them. Baptist Tradition: Baptist communities, especially those with a strict interpretation of the Bible, often emphasize the role of parents as God-appointed authorities in the home and church. Jehovah’s Witnesses: Jehovah’s Witnesses advocate for a strict family structure where parents have complete control, as outlined in the Bible. They believe that children should respect their parents and obey their instructions without question, based on New Testament teachings. Lutheran Beliefs, Especially Missouri Synod: The Missouri Synod, a branch of Lutheranism, promotes a hierarchical family structure where parents, particularly fathers, have ultimate authority. This belief is grounded in their interpretation of Biblical verses, such as Ephesians 6:1-4. Strict Judaism: In some interpretations of Orthodox Judaism, parental authority is heavily emphasized, often citing the concept of “kibud av va’em” (honoring parents). This can lead to a belief that children should unquestioningly follow their parents' wishes.

Transition to Independence

Despite these beliefs, the legal and moral recognition of children’s rights exists, and parents’ rights to control their children generally terminate when the child reaches the age of 18. At that point, the child is considered an adult and is entitled to make their own decisions. However, the challenges of this transition can be significant. Parents who have deeply ingrained beliefs in strict control may struggle with their child’s newfound independence.

Addressing Excessive Control

It is essential to recognize the potential negative impacts of excessive parental control. Children who grow up in an environment of oppression and lack of autonomy may struggle with self-esteem and decision-making skills. Here are some steps individuals and families can take to navigate these issues:

Education and Awareness: Understand the harm of excessive control and the importance of balanced family dynamics. Resources such as books and seminars can help raise awareness. Voice and Advocacy: Encourage children to express their feelings and needs. Seek support from professionals such as counselors or child welfare organizations. Legal Intervention: In severe cases, legal action may be necessary to protect children’s rights and ensure their well-being.

Community and Cultural Support

Communities and cultural institutions play a crucial role in promoting healthy family dynamics. By fostering environments that respect children’s rights and encourage parental guidance rather than control, communities can help mitigate the effects of excessive authority. Education programs and community workshops can provide valuable tools and resources for parents and families.

Conclusion

Parental control, rooted in various cultural and religious contexts, can lead to situations where parents believe they have the right to dominate their children. While cultural and religious influences can shape such beliefs, it is important to recognize the limits of parental authority according to legal and moral standards. By promoting awareness, advocacy, and community support, we can help foster healthier family relationships and ensure the well-being of all members.