Mastering Cognitive Distortions: A Guide to Stoic Mindfulness and Positive Thinking

- Samuel Fishwick

Samuel Fishwick, after attending a conference focused on stoic practices, observed that control over events outside of our immediate influence often leads to unhappiness when constantly fretted over. However, this does not mean that individuals should refrain from expressing their opinions, even when they are given the chance. The only aspect of life we truly control is our thoughts and how we choose to act upon them.

At the Core of Stoicism: Awareness and Control

One of the key tenets of stoicism is recognizing that many aspects of life are beyond our control. Mortimer Adler, a leading educational and moral philosopher, echoed this when he noted that most of our attitudes are formed by the age of four. This childhood foundation can shape our thought patterns, which in turn influence our emotions and behaviors. As Fishwick pointed out, a central assertion in cognitive therapy is that many of our internal dialogues are unhealthy and can exacerbate emotional struggles.

The Power of Thought Over Emotion

Happily married for almost four decades, Fishwick humorously shared that attraction is a human sensation, independent of any relationship's longevity. He noted that while attraction does not mysteriously disappear after marriage, one's reaction to it can evolve over time. This illustrates the concept of cognitive distortions, which can lead to negative outcomes when not recognized and addressed.

For instance, John, who applied for a promotion and felt he would never be promoted, was succumbing to a cognitive distortion known as the "all-or-nothing" thinking. He used absolute terms like "always" and "never" to describe his situation, which is a common and unhealthy thought pattern. Linda, feeling that no one could truly like her, was overgeneralizing, another typical cognitive distortion. Mary, focusing only on negative events, was displaying a mental filter, a distortion where only negative aspects are noticed.

Addressing Cognitive Distortions

Fishwick proposed several strategies for managing these cognitive distortions, including recognizing when they occur, confronting them, and changing the internal dialogue. For John, he suggested eliminating absolutes like "always" and "never" and reframing his thoughts to be more realistic and flexible. Linda was directed to remind herself that while some people might share an experience, each individual is unique. Mary should focus on both positive and negative events equally, adopting a grateful spirit to counteract the filtering and Selective Abstraction.

Rhonda, who brushed off compliments, was encouraged to accept positive feedback and not discount it. Chuck, feeling he had been stood up, overlooked his date being late due to traffic. This is a case of Jumping to Conclusions. Scott, who magnified his mistakes, was advised to see his game as a whole, recognizing both his errors and accomplishments. Laura, feeling overwhelmed by cleaning, was reminded that tasks are manageable if broken down into smaller parts, a lesson in Overgeneralization.

David, suffering from Legalistic Thinking, was advised to avoid inflexible rules and expectations by rethinking "should" statements. Finally, Jean, who felt responsible for her son's actions, was encouraged to recognize the limits of her influence, promoting healthy development by letting her son make independent choices.

The Role of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

Dr. David Burns, a renowned psychiatrist, has extensively studied cognitive distortions and developed CBT as a method to correct such patterns. Through the process of therapy, individuals can learn to identify and challenge these cognitive distortions, restructure more effective belief systems, and achieve a healthier mindset.

Conclusion

Samuel Fishwick's insights, rooted in the principles of stoicism, underscore the importance of mindfulness in navigating life's challenges. By recognizing and addressing cognitive distortions, individuals can develop a healthier emotional balance and lead more fulfilling lives. Embracing the power of thought over emotion opens the door to positive thinking and a more resilient mindset.